Many times I look back on my journey and wonder how I made it through. I have many physical and emotional scars from my journey, but I made it. Your loved one can, too. Read on for ideas on how to love on your person and their family. There are not enough words to express how much these acts of love meant to me. It doesn’t matter what age your person is. Take in mind their stage of life and go from there. Obviously not everyone has little ones to care for, but there is plenty of love to give for those who don’t!
Here are a few ways to show the love:
- Take the kids for a night (or 2, or 3, or 4). Keep in mind their ages. They may need some extra TLC. They are going through a traumatic event that will be with them forever. Be gentle, kind, loving, and positive. Go with your gut. When I knew my kids were with someone who loved them and wanted to be with them, I could relax, and sleep, and relax, and not worry.
- Clean when no one is at their house. Sneak in if you have to. Find out when the family will be out of the house and go clean. Don’t ask. Just do it. She’ll be mortified for a moment when she comes home, knowing you saw how messy her house was, but leave a sweet note before you leave. All will be good. The family will be happy in a clean house.
- Homemade blankets can be special. I still use my blankets that were made over ten years ago.
- Nights can be lonely. If you’re up in the middle of the night, send a prayer up for your person, or send a text saying I love you. Trust me, your person will love it.
- Does your person like to read? Watch movies? If so, what kind of movie? If you’re not sure, stick with family friendly movies! I have another post listing some great movie ideas! I used to love war movies before I had cancer. Still can’t watch them. Makes me anxious. I only watched comedy/funny movies during treatment. I remember someone gave me a subscription to Netflix during my treatment. We LOVED it! These days people may not have DVD players. But you can always purchase movies or seasons of favorite shows!
What not to do…
- No pillows. Just don’t. Do not make pillows or buy pillows. Just trust me.
- Don’t go to the hospital when your loved one is in the hospital, after surgery. Mastectomies are traumatic and painful. Send a flower or a gift card to the caregiver who is with your loved one at the hospital. Have a pizza delivered to the kids and caregiver.
- Don’t go to a chemo treatment. If you offer to drive your person, don’t go back to the treatment room with them. Every treatment Benadryl was sent through my IV along with the chemo meds, and I was out within minutes. The LAST thing I wanted to do was talk.
No matter what you do, know your loved one appreciates your acts of kindness and care. Bless you for taking the time to help. It will not go unnoticed.
This post will be evolving as I think of more! If you have suggestions please send them my way!